"The one and only, Adele Dazeem!" - Random thoughts on Oscars

 
           We all know who won and who lost and who ate the pizza. Therefore, doing a proper recap is pointless. However, I have some Oscar-related thoughts and I'd like to share them. Simply put, here's what I liked and didn't like about the Oscars:

Liked/Loved-

1) Lupita's princess dress was just gorgeous. It makes me want to wear a big flowy gown myself and just twirl around.
2) Among other fashion-related stuff, I liked Kristin Chenoweth's and Karen O's outfits, Emma Watson's hairdo and Naomi Watts' necklace.
3) Coming to speeches, there were a few that stood out. Lupita's was the most heartfelt and inspirational. "It doesn't escape me for one moment that so much joy in my life is thanks to so much pain in someone else's"- this was an incredibly powerful and perceptive sentence and I have been thinking about it ever since. All these biopics we watch, most of them are based around someone's struggle and Patsey definitely had one of the hardest lives ever. We see numerous actors thank and pay tribute to the people they play or their hardships but I don't think anyone has put it the way Lupita did. Also, the way she ended it-

4)The other speeches I liked were Cate Blanchett's "The world is round, people!" and "Hashtag: Suck it" badass woman power declaration, Darlene Love's acceptance ballad, the "Let It Go" duo with their perfectly rhimy speech, the short documentary winners' heartfelt tribute to the woman who was their subject, and all winners whose hands shook while they were on the stage.
5) Lupita, Meryl and Amy dancing with Pharrell. Goddesses.

6) That selfie.

7) And all its subsequent parodies.

8) Lupita Nyong'o's brother who is my new role model.
9) The other selfie where Benedict Cumberbatch just popped up from the back.

10) Cumberbatch photobombing U2. Not once, but twice. #winneratOscars

11) Cumberbatch crying during Lupita's speech.
12) Lupita photobombing Jared Leto.
13) Lupita and JLaw fake-fighting.

14) The fact that JLaw looked happier than Lupita when Lupita won. Bullet dodged.
15) Brad Pitt handing out plates.

16) ALL the pizza photos.
17) Kevin Spacey presenting.
18) Bill Murray standing up after Darlene Love sang.
19) The "Moon Song" performance and the fact that Ezra Koenig's socks matched Karen O's dress.

20) "Possibility number 1: 12 Years A Slave wins Best Picture. Possibility number 2: You're all racists. And now welcome our first white presenter, Anne Hathaway!" #burn
21) Steve McQueen jumping in the air after they won Best Picture. I love this so much. As much as people hate on the Oscars, and they are definitely not decisive word on what is best or not, even someone as unconventional as McQueen was overjoyed at his film getting the award because it is a recognition of efforts and that's always a good and happy thing.

22) The fact that 2 of the Fight Club cast members now have Oscars.
23) Alfonso Cuaron and Emmanuel Lubezki- Oscar winners. FUCK YEAH!
24) Actually, just the fact that Gravity won Best Editing. That movie is so clever with its cuts. I am super impressed with the Academy for this.
25) Daniel Day-Lewis. Such a puppy.

Sidenote: Meryl Streep gave DDL his Oscar last year. Imagine if she had won this year. Actually, imagine if they keep winning alternate years, giving each other Oscars for all eternity because true artists never die and time is a flat circle and ZOMG!

26) Lupita Nyong'o's lip balm.
27) I will talk about the montages later but just the fact that the last "heroes" montage included Indiana Jones, Beasts of the Southern Wild, Speed, The Princess Bride, Independence Day (speech and all), Harry Potter (more on that later too), Aliens, Back to the Future and Air Force One.
28) Spike Jonze winning Best Original Screenplay.

29) And Spike Jonze.

30) SPIKE JONZE!!!!!!!!

31) I love you, Spike Jonze. Please marry me.
32) The fact that I later dreamt that Joaquin Phoenix was hosting the Oscars. I don't remember more than that. Sorry.
33) Leo lost and that sucks but seriously though, WoWS is such a IDGAF movie that I can't feel that bad. But all the "Poor Leo" memes have been hilarious. This one's my fav-

34) Matthew McConaughey was very sweet when he presented with Kim Novak. She was definitely having some problems and he was very gracious.
35) Ditto for Angelina Jolie.
36) Ellen making all of the JLaw falling jokes, so that we didn't have to. Chill humans. We've all done stupid things when drunk (more on this later too though).
37) Ellen in Glinda's costume.

38) Ellen in general.
39) Nicholas Hoult. Dawwwwwwww.

40) Not playing most of the winners off.
41) That American Hustle didn't win anything. MUAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAA!

42) I laughed like hell in the Bradley Cooper nomination clip though. Best in show.
43) And my absolute favourite thing that happened at the Oscars- the coming together of Joseph Gordon-Levitt and Emma Watson. Such a perfect unison of good looks, charm and talent. Of course, I want them to get married now, but for the time being I will be totally happy with both of them starring in a romcom together. Preferably something set in the 1st half of the 20th century and screwball-y. You can see it, right? It can be all witty and stuff. DanRad can be there too. Remember when he and JGL danced at last year's Oscars? It's all perfect.

Disliked/hated-
1) The whole "heroes" theme. I happened to like Pink's performance but it was so unnecessary, as were the montages. No one bloody tunes in to watch the Oscars because of whatever theme they decide to go with. That's just silly and confusing and distracting.
2) Matthew McConaughey and Jared Leto's white tuxedos. They looked like really good-looking waiters, but waiters nonetheless.
3) Harrison Ford. What happened, Indy?
4) Jim Carrey. It was super awkward to watch.
5) Most of the intros were awkward to watch. ADELE DAZEEM!!!!!!

6) Jared Leto's hair but that's like one of the things I hate most in the world. Well, not the hair but the hair on him. Annoyances!
7) I didn't listen to U2. BOTH times I watched the ceremony. I can't. Nope.
8) Also, Bette Midler singing "Wind Beneath My Wings". That song is one of the many we were made to sing throughout school and I will always feel resentful towards it. And it wasn't a very good performance either.
9) Jennifer Lawrence was a bit mental yesterday. When she came on stage to give Best Actor and randomly started screaming at the crowd- not funny, JLaw. Such a misfire.
10) Speaking of, the entire Jimmy Kimmel thing during the red carpet- what the fuck was that? If you must know, I was eating salsa at like 6:30 in the morning while watching the show. Problem?
11) Chris Hemsworth's wife was super preggers. The Loki in me kind of wanted her to give birth then though, just to see how people would react.
12) Where was Hiddles? Why was he not there? You must rectify this next year, Oscars.
13) Back to the "heroes" thing- why the fuck would you put the new Spider-Man and Superman only? They are barely heroic.
14) Also, I kind of hate it when anything Harry Potter-related is used during the Oscars. You had your chance, bastards. Avada kedavra!
15) The Great Beauty winning Best Foreign Film. Boo you pretentious whores.
16) I mean Mads was sitting there, razor-sharp cheekbones and everything. He could have come up if The Hunt had won. Dumasses.
17) The constant standing ovations. They just weren't cool anymore.
18) Matthew McConaughey's speech was actually kind of terrible. I listened to it twice to make sure. He should have just said "Alright alright alright" and left.
19) Those Oscar statuette shaped bauble thingies at the back. Terrifying! I'm surprised drunk JLaw didn't fight one of them.
20) In totes agreement with all who are angry at Oscars not including honorary Oscars in the main ceremony. Angelina Jolie's speech for that was one of the most beautiful things ever.
21) That I should really get off the net while the ceremony is going on. I missed a lot the first time tweeting and chatting with friends. Also that the whole Twitter shutting down thing made me panic a tad too much.
22) My absolute least-favourite thing about these Oscars- just how incredibly predictable and boring the winners ended up being. There were people on my Facebook page who have barely watched any of the movies but were announcing how they did with the predictions because they had obviously read about it in 150000 sites already. I really want Oscars to change its airdate. We need some excitement, come on! Nothing against the winners, just that an upset or two is always fun.

         And that's it. As you can see, I was quite happy with the ceremony in general. Let's end this with what has become the catchphrase of this award season. See you next year, O sweet headache-inducing Oscars.

"The real question is this: was all this legal? Absolutely not."- FAVOURITE EVERYTHING ELSE OF 2013

Just a mix of all my other favourites of the year. The favourite performances and favourite films lists are yet to come :)

• Ethan Wate, Beautiful Creatures- Because he talks about Titanic and Bukowski within 5 minutes of each other.
• Samantha, Her- She was just such an incredible person and, as weird as it may sound, so full of life.
• Shaikh, The Lunchbox- So simple and friendly. Both a common and an incredibly rare kind of man.
• Anna, Frozen- Because she wakes up like a normal female human.
• Gary King, The World's End- Even though I know he's kind of sad, Simon Pegg just infuses him with so much energy.
• Wadjda, Wadjda- Total badass heroine.
• Mason, Short Term 12- Just the way he connects to these troubled kids is amazing.
• Shannon Mullins, The Heat- Not just funny. But still, my god, soooo funny!
• Rosalyn, American Hustle- Because she's basically Jennifer Lawrence, and Jennifer Lawrence is awesomesauce.

Favourite Character of 2013- Frances from Frances Ha

Yes she's confused and whiny and all that, but she's also so likeable and funny and undateable. I love her.

• The Wolf of Wall Street- This would have been on the list on the basis of having Spike Jonze and Rob Reiner as part of the cast alone.
• Blue Jasmine- While our ladies shine the most, they are supported by a number of other fantastic actors.
• Nebraska- Ugh just look at those beautiful old faces!
• Prisoners- Though everyone doesn't get equal footing in terms of script, I thought all the actors did great work in this.

Best Ensemble of 2013- This is the End

So many reasons this could have been awful, but the actors play caricatures of themselves and really elevate the movie.

• Kaijus, Pacific Rim- Who needs character development when you can have supremely cool-looking monsters?
• Ted Hendricks, The Secret Life of Walter Mitty- I love Adam Scott to death but good lord, he can play an excellent a-hole! I wanted to slap him so much.
• The Eppses, 12 Years A Slave- While most of the white characters in film can be included in this list, Mr. and Mrs. Epps were a special breed of terrifying, loathsome creatures.
• Danny McBride, This is the End- "The fucker's gots to GOOO!"
• Bathsheba, The Conjuring- In order for a horror movie to work, it needs something truly frightening and Bathsheba was just that. We never see her properly but her presence is scary enough.
• Loki, Thor: The Dark World- This is the 3rd year in a row Hiddles' Loki has made it into this list. That's because he always manages to steal the show in every scene he is in.
• Pigs, Upstream Colour- Because whaaaaaaaaaat?? My brain shut down every time they were on screen.
• Alien, Spring Breakers- No, he is not a "villain" villain but he is a bad guy, completely corrupted by his desire and greed.
• Smaug/Khan- 2013 was supposed to be Benedict Cumberbatch's year but that didn't happen because his big films didn't use him well. Still, he was a more than decent villain for his screentime in both The Hobbit: blahblah Smaug and Star Trek Into Darkness.

Biggest villain of 2013- Uncle Charlie from Stoker

Oh he is just so sinister AND attractive. Forget India, I was confused by these feelings myself. And the film really just basks in Matthew Goode's gargantuan sex appeal.

• Gypsy Danger, Pacific Rim- It's mindblowingly amazeballs and it comes with a sword!
• Jonah Hill's teeth, The Wolf of Wall Street- They're a thing of beauty, aren't they?
• The clothes, Laurence Anyways- From that showstopping gown to those raining scarves- ugh I want it all!
• Milky Way, This is the End- We all want a bite of that Milky Way, and I don't even like Milky Way.
• Nail polish, Spring Breakers- It is literally a trend maker. Love it.
• The Gos' arms, Only God Forgives- I *might* have made this list just for this entry. But seriously, look at them.
• The video game, Her- Theodore's lonely life is reflected in the video game. It is both funny and tragic.
• The shoes, Stoker- When are a pair of shoes not just a pair of shoes? Also, I adore them.
• The lunchbox, The Lunchbox- That one lunchbox is sent to the wrong person, and lives are changed!

Favourite Object of 2013- The bicycle, Wadjda

Such a simple wish for a girl to have and to have so much riding on it, literally. It is a symbol and a ray of hope.

(newest addition, especially for 2013)

• Scarlett Johansson, Don Jon- Accompanied by her gum chewing, ScarJo sounds like something out of the Jersey Shore, but she still keeps it classy.
• Cate Blanchett, Blue Jasmine- It just sounds so affected, so made up. I love it.
• Margot Robbie, The Wolf of Wall Street- Kinda amazed that an Aussie can get that accent so right.
• James Franco, Spring Breakers- Franco just gives it his all. It's brilliant.

Favourite Accent of 2013- Emma Watson, The Bling Ring

I have been trying to learn it ever since the first teaser came out. It's hilarious.

Favourite Quotes of 2013

Thoughts

        Helloo all! Question- if you decided to go to a red carpet with a paper bag over your head, what would you write on it?

       Questions like this keep me up at night...

       Anyways, my movie-related thoughts for this week:

1) I have been planning to start on Ben Wheatley's filmography for a while now. Looks like his latest project is going to give me the push I needed. High Rise, based on the novel by J.G. Ballard, is about a doctor who gets involved in the secret world of a high rise built during the Thatcher era in England where the tenants are divided into quarrelling classist factions. And none other than Tom Hiddleston is going to star as the doctor whose name is Robert Laing. Hiddles is doing great things with his career and this whole projects sounds very exciting. Wheatley is also going to direct the first two episodes of Doctor Who series 8 so I'm really pumped to see his work.

2) One of my most anticipated films of 2015, the Fassy-Cotillard starrer-Macbeth, has started filming. While  the Macbeths are as perfect as they come, the rest of the characters are also going to be played by some excellent actors. Paddy Considine is going to be Banquo, Sean Harris is Macduff, and Jack Raynor and Elizabeth Debicki are also in the film. I am guessing that the former will play prince Malcolm and the latter will be Lady Macduff. Eitherways, this is one amazing and rather hot cast. I am currently studying the play in college and I swear, I just keep imagining this film during the lectures. I need it. Justin Kurzel is directing it.

3) Criminally underrated Paul Bettany will star as the Vision in the upcoming The Avengers: Age of Ultron. Bettany is actually one of the original Marvel actors from phase 1, voicing Tony Stark's awesome interface Jarvis. Of course, I am fairly certain this will be addressed in the movie. In the Marvel comic-verse, Vision goes from being a baddie android to a good guy and even marries the Scarlet Witch, who will be played by Elizabeth Olsen in the movie. I guess I should be more skeptical about this film because seriously, where do you go from after The Avengers, but I'm super duper excited about all these developments. It has started filming today in Johannesburg. BIG HULK YESSSSS!!!

4) Leonardo DiCaprio and Jonah Hill, easily my favourite on screen couple of 2013, are going to reteam for a drama about the bombing during the 1996 Atlanta Olympics. Hill will play Richard Jewell, a security guard who was first hailed as a hero for discovering the bomb and helping people to evacuate only to then be suspected as the perpetrator behind the bombing. Leo will play his attorney. After The Wolf of Wall Street, I am ready to watch these two in anything whatsoever and this actually sounds pretty fantastic.

5) Other casting stuff- Ewan McGregor, Tye Sheridan, Ciarin Hinds and Ayelet Zurer will be starring in Rodrigo Garcia's Last Days in the Desert. In it, McGregor will play a double role of a holy man and a demon who journeys through a desert. The synopsis is described as "an encounter with a family struggling to survive in this harsh environment forces the holy man to confront his own fate." McGregor is one of my most favourite actors and this sounds like an interesting plot. Emma Watson will star alongside Ethan Hawke in Alejandro Amenábar's Regression which is about "dealing with one's deepest primal fears". Amenábar directed one of my most favourite horror movies, The Others, so I will be looking forward to this. Johnny Depp and Tom Hardy will co-star in Black Mass about Whitey Bulger, one of America’s Most Wanted men and the leader of the the Winter Hill Gang, and who was also apparent;y an FBI informant. Depp will play Bulger and Hardy will play an FBI agent named John Connolly who was a childhood friend of Bulger's. One of Depp's best performances ever was in Donnie Brasco and it will be great seeing him go down the gangster road again, especially after his recent career choices.

6) If you weren't aware of it already, my fellow chick with accent from German/Danish-land, Mette has started a Youtube channel with her sister and it is awesome. Check out their second video-

7) Posters- Under the Skin's poster is a thing of beauty. I am kind of skeptical about the film because it really does not seem the kind I will like, but the poster is definitely gorgeous. The Transcendence poster is a bit creepy and not in a good way. It makes me feel gross for some reason. However, The Poster Of The Millenium, THE Poster To End All Posters is THIS ONE. It's from a Bengali movie called Obhishopto Nighty which roughly translates to 'haunted nightgown'. This poster is literally everywhere in my city. I don't know whether to laugh or cry. #onlyinIndia

8) Trailers- Not really a trailer but here's a 15 minute long "foreshadowing" of the upcoming season 4 of Game of Thrones, with bigger dragons and more Hodor (everyone say "HODOR!"). I can't wait. I have my Red Wedding t-shirt ready for the season premiere. The Two Faces of January's trailer is really thrilling and the film looks gorgeous. Pretty impressive people involved too. The second trailer of Hannibal is even more stunning than the first. Ugh! Finally, the trailer of the week is the latest one of Richard Ayoade's The Double. It looks crazy and creepy and cool and I still love Jesse Eisenberg in spite of how much picturing him as a tattooed Lex Luthor makes me anxious.

9) Finally, I adore the "Celebrities Read Mean Tweets" feature on Jimmy Kimmel. Benedict Cumberbatch's was one of the best-

His cheekbones though.

Toodles!